Captivating - a reflection of my roots

I have mentioned earlier in one of my blog entries the 3 cores of a man’s heart which is: 1. a battle to fight, 2. an adventure to live and 3. A beauty to rescue and for women her cores are 1. To display beauty, 2. To be romanced and 3. To play an irreplaceable role in an adventure or to make an impact.

I want to relate it in the light of my roots- my mom and my dad. My dad is a recognized playboy by his peers. At the age of 32 he was still very much single until he met my mom, a 27 year old heartthrob and old fashioned virgin which is a jewel during that time. I cannot describe it well without being straight forward and down right blunt so pardon me. Daddy must have slept with God knows how many women before he settled with my mom. In all of them, he never said he loved them but he was attracted to them and he liked each and every one of them. Men can really be adventurous that if not channeled properly like my dad used to live his bachelorhood then women can fall prey as one of those adventures. But my dad had a beauty to rescue; my mom who was then engaged to a pure Chinese college sweetheart of 7 years never entertained any other suitors despite 10 other proposals from different men more successful than my dad who was just a budding businessman back then.

My dad took a chance and had this rationale, “if she will just be kind to me I will pursue her no matter what’. My mom is nice to everyone so my dad took the time to win my mom’s heart and after 6 months they got married, the 7 year old engagement with my mom’s Chinese were just memories. That is because my dad has a battle to fight, he saw my mom as the battle and the woman he will spend the rest of his life with. And so after 30 years of marriage and even on my dad’s deathbed, he would write notes of “I love you” to my mom, my sister and I. He never uttered those words to any woman but to my mom and to us.

I never saw nor heard my dad look for another woman while I was growing up even if my mom would have her not so loveable days. Looking back, my mom and I would blush how my dad would brush aside her moods and just pursue her.

My dad was kicked out of the house when he was 12 or 15 years old by his dad and heard no one say “I love you” to him. He practically raised himself and was a self-made man. For him those words are priceless, he was never careless to say those words without backing it up with an act of commitment. And he just gave those words to his one and only wife of 30 years – my mom. I am so proud of my dad how he acted like a real man.

Isn’t it very rare now for a man to speak of his affections and really mean it by backing it up with an act to commit. Most men would have very obvious and yet unspoken words of love. Well, if it's not unspoken then it’s really not meant and worth speaking of in the first place so leave those feelings at the door because it is not serious enough to bring to light the actual intentions.

Meanwhile, my mom never gave any hint nor initiated anything. In fact, she was trying to hide herself from my dad because she already has an outstanding relationship. My dad won’t back-out because he believes that if my mom’s bf really loved her then he should have not waited for 7 long years.

I want to honor my parents by writing them on my blog. Their love story was unveiled and witnessed right before my very eyes. And those portions when I wasn’t born yet, my mom would give me bits and pieces of stories and re-live it as if my dad was still alive.

They are my inspiration and example that if there is real love, the man would speak and the woman would accept wholeheartedly.

My mom played an irreplaceable role in my dad’s adventure by being the only woman in his life and by being our mother, raising us the godly way. Their partnership was ever present during my growing years. They would both pray for me and guide me when I had relationships at a very young age. I had two long engagements I had called off because I wasn’t ready. Until now at thirty, my dad’s advises keep ringing on my own ears. I want to find someone like my dad who is a man changed and reformed by love. That is why I believe love conquers all – because God is love and you cannot give love away if you have no revelation of who God is in your life. The essence of a man is seen on what he pursues and my dad stayed true to my mom because he sought after God. I have never seen a man get up and pray at 4am to just seek God in his word and sing love songs to him. My dad is my ideal in most ways and I am so blessed to have someone like him.

My mom grew even more beautiful in the presence of my loving dad because he would
Constantly assure her. And my dad had won a lot of battles in his life because of the beauty that is my mom who was always there for her. They were not perfect beings but they were perfect for each other.

All of us have our own perfect fit if we allow God’s perfect choice to reveal itself in Hs perfect time.